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Failbaddon the Armless
Summary The Despoiler of Chaos that wishes to one up his daddy, the infamous butt monkey of the Chaos Gods and the most pathetic display of tactical strategy to EVER ''grace Fluff on tabletop, this is, Failbaddon the Armless/Harmless. the man who failed to destroy a single planet 13th times alongside conquering Holy Terra. The man whose only talent is getting angry and killing, but on terms of long planning ''SUCKS. ''Oh and he is armless because his tabletop model cannot hold both of his arms. Even thought he did destroy Cadia, unified the Chaos Legions into a suitable force and the Black Crusades were not for conquest, but for weakening the Imperium, but hey, muh memes rite? Powers and Stats '''Tier: FAILURE '''psychologically,' physically '''Solar System level (he is a rape machine on the tabletop though) Overrated, discredited, old meme. Name: '''Ezekyle Abaddon, Abaddon the Despoiler, Abaddouche, Abaddabadoo, Failbaddon the Armless, Abby, Abaddon the Dickspoiler, or Failbaddon the Harmless '''Origin: Warhammer 40.000. 1d4chan Gender: '''Male (but he gets pussy whipped by a old man with a cigar, so perhaps not) '''Age: '''At least 10,000+ years old (he is mentally a emo, tantrum having teenager, thought) '''Classification: FAILURE, '''Fluff fail, Chaos Space Marine, muh Mary Sue, Memetic Failure, Chaos Lord. '''Powers and Abilities: '''Telekinesis (to hold things without hands) laughable topknot (he can distract you with his hair) Subhuman Physical Characteristics (well, barely he ''almost ''lost to the greatest thing 40k ever made, Kharn the Betrayer, but because Geedubs loves this failure of a character, he lived, fuck u GW!) '''MUH PLOT ARMOR: Immortality (He is Chaos's favorite chewing toy), Regeneration (At least Low-Mid, possibly up to Low-Godly with the Chaos Gods' humoring), Psychic Powers (known as the Farce, or the Farts), Reality Warp-'RETCONS,' Immunity to disease and poison (he sucks far too much for Nurgle to infect) Resistance to Good Writing, Mary Sue Physiology: (Daemonic Protection means he cannot be killed by anything only in the physical world, and he can only be permanently killed by a Psyker with pure mind and heart destroying his soul, Power Nullification due to Khorne's blessings, Immunity to much Power Nullification, Soul Manipulation, Mind Manipulation, Reality Warping, etc. while his blessings are active) (Effortlessly created a aura of ation and PIS to a unprecedented number of Assassins sent to kill him, including numerous Culexus Assassins. Such Assassins had so great pity on him, they got distracted and were killed. Has put down the rebellion of many powerful Chaos sorcerers with sheer force because GW just LOVES TO WANK THIS FAILURE.) Attack Potency: '''And, as you can see, lacks arms, so '''Below Average Class, outside of fluff by tabletop Solar System Class. '(did i not mention how GW LOVES to wank this douche?) '''Speed: '''Sub-Human because of his curbersome Terminator Armor. (he managed to blitz a Horus clone? piss off, my memes speak truer than canon.) '''Lifting Strength: '''HAHAHAHAHA, NO. ARMS; '''Subhuman, '''With arms thought possibly '''Above average human '(Can barely lift a piece of shit sword that can damage the Emperor and the Talon of Horus which destroyed Horus's maze made by the Emprah himself and one-hit-killed a Horus clone) 'Striking Strength: '''KEK, can a armless guy hurt you in any way? yeah, i don't think so. '''Durability: ' At least 'Solar System level, '''likely '''far higher, '''thanks to good ol' Games Workshop wanking and Retcons. '''Stamina: '''who the hell cares? he is a half-tarded mary sue. '''Range: Worthless '(say it with me folks, NO. ARMS.) 'Standard Equipment: ' * '''Terminator Armor: filled with charms, trophies of fallen foes and reinforced by Abaddon himself, and as you can tell, his mechanic skills are proportionate to his tactical "skills". * Drach'nyen: '''A piece of crap daemon sword none even bother to document around the galaxy, i bet it is even more obscure on Warpspace. * '''Talon of Horus: '''It was the weapon that his stupid dumbass of a Primarch used, it has a shit range, and event thought it is a melee weapon with great damage output thanks to being a power claw, his inability to be better wielded by Abaddon by (as a very reliable source said) failing to kill a single guardsman speaks volumes of Failbaddon's mental ation. '''Intelligence: Emo teen, he can barely keep control of a bunch of astartes with differing mindsets, goals and god allegiances. Can only bully others into joining him, he has no charisma, he is just a thug with anger problems. Weaknesses: Himself, 'Missing his Daddy HorHor's Love, His own tantrums and unreliability to keep a bunch of Chaos Space Marines of 8th different legions on line 13th times. Gallery of FAIL Failaddon.jpg|See? Slaash!.jpg|NEVER HAPPENED OUTSIDE OF TABLETOP Abaddon's master plan.jpg|His true intentions. Fact+_5c9a95074d1152291dfd803d4e8d8d38.jpg|Creed wins, as always. alright_then__we_ll_call_it_a_draw_by_blazbaros-dbfvgew.png|WHAT WILL TOTALLY HAPPEN ON CANON.|link=https://blazbaros.deviantart.com/art/Alright-then-we-ll-call-it-a-draw-691789784 SkullCrusher.jpg Armless the Harmless.jpg Others '''Notable Victories: ' lol, what do you think? 'Notable Losses: ' Imperium of Man, 13th times and counting '''Inconclusive Matches: Category:Warhammer 40k Category:Downplay Category:Fail Category:MUH MEMES AR CANAN MAH Category:Fuck memes Category:Stupidity Users Category:Chaos Users Category:Idiots Category:S Category:Retcon Manipulation Category:Sadists Category:Topknot Users Category:Plot Armor Users Category:Armored Characters Category:Mary Sues Category:Villains Category:Telekinesis Category:Fuck your durability Category:Wanked by canon Category:Soldiers Category:Warhammer 40,000 Category:Assholes Category:Mass Murderers